Wednesday, March 5, 2008

Everything Happens For A Reason

This school year is my 9th grade year. Before this year, I went to a public school where the people were horrible. The girls were extremely rude and did things with guys that were...well we wont go there. The boys were worse, however. And I have the scars to prove it. Scars from knives, punches, kicks, and various other things. Everyday I was made fun of and I began to feel so low about myself and began to wonder "Why would God ever let this happen to me?". I questioned God's love for me. Thats how horrible and unbearable it got, I questioned my Fathers love for me. The thing is, these people who did this to me were my FRIENDS. Now I see the light of that issue. They treated everybody like this, it was who they are.
I was reluctant to leave, I had been there for so long. I knew everybody. But when I toured my current school, I felt some sort of awakening in me. It's hard to describe but it felt like a part of me that had been turned off had been woken up. I made the decision to leave my old school for good.
At my new school, I was shocked beyond belief at things that people did.
People smiled in the hallways, boys opened doors for you, boys helped you with books, you didn't have to worry about being talked about after leaving a lunch table, and nobody told you that you better "do something" with them "or else". Looking back, isn't it horrible? To be shocked by things that should just be a natural thing to do, for the sake of everybody? But, I truly was shocked. Nobody should have to be shocked by good manners and love from friends.
Another change, I felt God wrap His arms around me. I felt Him in every aspect of my life and started taking notice in things I normally would have called "good luck". I found myself listening to christian music, praising God in silent times, not questioning His love for me. It was an amazing experience, feeling at one with the Lord. I never had that connection to that extent, I never was 100000% sure in the words in the Bible and the fact that our Lord is real.
But now, I believe so strongly. Ever since welcoming God into my life full force, things have a "glass half full" look.
Looking back on my question of if God loved me or not during my terrible school I had been going to, I now think I know the answer.
If I didn't have treatment like that at my old school, I would never fully appreciate things like this at my new school. I would take for granted these people who truly care about me and show me they care. If not for these people doing terrible, undescribable things to me, I never would have changed to my current school and fallen head over heels in love with Christ.

Things happen for a reason.
It's cliché, everybody says it.
But I know it, just honestly think about that.
God needs you to be at a certain point, He needs you to gain certain knowledge and wisdom and sometimes there is only one way. The hard way. But He holds your hand throughout it, and He knows it is hard.
Never doubt the love your Father has for you in a weary time.

It reminds me of a story on my grandma's wall in a picture frame.
"A man looked back upon his life journey while he was in heaven about to enter the gates. He saw two sets of footprints in a beach, symbolizing his life walk. 'This is Me.' God said, pointing to one set of footprints, 'And this is you.' He said as He pointed to the other set. The man noticed that at some points, there was only one set of prints. 'This represents your hard, difficult times.' God said. The man was confused, he was alone during his time of need? God knew the man was confused and said, 'You were never alone. These are My footprints, I was carrying you.'"

God Bless,
Lauren

16 comments:

Kaili said...

That story was so great! I love it! "I was carrying you.." I LOVE that line!

TO be honest, I was TOTALLY SHOCKED to hear what some people actually DO in public school!!! I mean, what you said totally astounded me! I can't believe people treat other people that way!
I have been home-schooled since 2nd grade so I never really got to know what some public schools are like, but I have heard some things from my public-school friend in texas. Some public high-schools are just awful!

Thank you for sharing your story. I'm so glad for you that you were able to transfer, and are doing better now. Don't EVER EVER EVER doubt God's love for you! Romans 5:8 says that even while we were sinners and didn't know He existed, didn't care, or maybe outright opposed Him, He loved us, so much that Jesus came to die a horrible death for us. God loves us, and we are SO unworthy!
It is incredible!

God Bless!
~Kaili

Araken said...

Wow, Lauren! That is soooo cool! Really inspiring and deep. Keep up the good work and see you at school tomorrow.

Say, whatever happened to Fidget?

Ian said...

I go to a traditional school, so I don't see or hear about so many bad things going on (although there are some, such as alcohol), but I have one friend who used to sort of bully me a lot - punching me, etc. but that was mostly because I kept insulting him (jokingly, as I would do to anyone else and as anyone else would do to anyone else in my school). He doesn't do it so much anymore, fortunately. Now, the worst that I'll get from any of my friends at school is a punch in the shoulder. It's sort of the friendship signal at my school - you punch friends in the shoulder, and other people anywhere else (if you are actually mad at them. Punching friends is done with a light attitude).

We have that same God/man story hanging in our house, only a different version. I like it.

:)Ian(:

Elliot Reed said...

I must be completly honest, I am a homeschooler and hearing those things is not entirly shocking, and yet I am shocked! I don't know if I would truly be able to handle it so well, but then I read your post. It is such an encouragement to hear such things, so thank you for posting that.

~Elliot

P.S. You know, I just put a verse that would go well with that on my blog.

Paris said...

That is one of the sweetest posts I've ever read. It really shows that peoples actions can effect others. I personally have never been bullied, but even at a private school I see people hurting each other all day, physically and emotionally. You are totally awesome and I'm sure God has something big planned for you.

strivin' said...

Wow. Your old school does not sound like a good place too learn. It's hard to focus with so much other stuff going on.

Sapphira Adi said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
***Flinn-fan-of-the-Twins*** said...

Amazing! I am glad to meet you Lady Lauren! I am called Flinn!

I loved your story. I know a lot of kids who go to public school and I think it is a true battlefield there. I can imagine the struggles you had. God is great though, is He not?

Madi said...

That story just gives me a great feeling and its so true!!!God helps us through are hard times and carries us,He will never leave us nor forsake us(that's somewhere in the Bible,I don't remember where exactly.)My mom thought about sending me to a public school once but changed her mind at the last second,literally,we were just getting all the papers and stuff ready.She was also going to send my sister to a private (unchristian)school,but God brought to mind the verse "Better is oneday in your house than a thousand elsewhere."(I don't know where that one is found either,SORRY!)My sister has been going to a Christian school for two years school now instead of the public one, and I started going there this year too.-Madi

Madi said...

That story just gives me a great feeling and its so true!!!God helps us through are hard times and carries us,He will never leave us nor forsake us(that's somewhere in the Bible,I don't remember where exactly.)My mom thought about sending me to a public school once but changed her mind at the last second,literally,we were just getting all the papers and stuff ready.She was also going to send my sister to a private (unchristian)school,but God brought to mind the verse "Better is oneday in your house than a thousand elsewhere."(I don't know where that one is found either,SORRY!)My sister has been going to a Christian school for two years school now instead of the public one, and I started going there this year too.-Madi

Madi said...

Sorry!I accidentally published my comment twice!-Madi

Sapphira Adi said...

If I have never said it, welcome to the YCF!

Paris said...

Hey, Lauren! Have you read any of Wayne Thomas Batson’s books: The Door Within, The Rise of the Wrym Lord, The Final Storm, Isle of Swords, and the soon to be released Isle of Fire? If you haven’t, you don’t know what you’re missing! Check out Mr. Wayne’s blog: http://enterthedoorwithin.blogspot.com/

I’m doing this “review” for a Treasure Hunt Mr. Wayne is having. Come join us! If I was the first person to inform you about the contest, please mention that when you sign up. Thanks!

Zoe said...

I have never really read your blog until just now.

That is a great story.

Like some of the others here, I am homeschooled and have never really had a taste of what that's like. Sure I have been teased and things like that, but of course that is nothing in comparison.

Thank you so much for sharing.

Lauren Ann said...

Hi, my name is also Lauren, and I am 13 years old. I go to a public school. I use that to be a light in dark places. I have made friends, that would never do those kinds of thing, but I am sure that there are some people who would. Nice blog! This was my first time reading it!

Tasha said...

I'm so glad you grew in your relationship with Chrsit! Also your blog helped me understand some things, so thanks!

But your right, everything does happen for a reason. God knows how you would react to certain circumstances, so he gives you them in accordance to his plan, and your decisions lead you to where God always wanted you to be! :) [and from there of course he'll pursue your love, because he loves you dearly]